Oh, how I love the gamble of thrifting. The way you can scour a secondhand shop’s racks or sketchy online listings for weeks on end in vain…and then, just as you’ve given up on finding anything remotely worth your while, a golden item emerges from the dust: well-made, visually appealing, convenient, maybe even reasonably priced. What a joy! That’s how I felt when I found the quaint wooden corner shelf that now presides over my desk area. The top half, home to knick-knacks and nerdy anime figurines, we shall not discuss here. But the lower section holds my small history with my Traveler’s Notebook: archive binders, one for nearly every year since 2018. These binders contain every TN-sized insert I’ve ever used. And on the spine of every volume: a title of sorts, a single word that captures the “plot” of that year.
One could certainly choose a word of the year after the fact, around November or December, distilling everything that has happened to its essence. It’d be a fun exercise in summary, pinning down an understanding of it all. But I like to take my stabs at meaning in the dark. I often pick my word of the year before that year has started, or maybe in its early months. Of course, since I choose mostly based on vibes, the year sometimes proves me utterly wrong. Remember when I named 2020 the year of “Mastery”? lol). Oftentimes, events do end up aligning, but in an entirely different way than I’d imagined. As I prepare to add a new volume to the shelf of intention, I thought now would be a good time to share how the most recent one-word forecasts have fared.
2022 - Driftwood. Coming down from a hectic time and picturing what I wanted the year ahead to look like, the image that floated to mind was of someone quietly searching the shoreline after a storm. I imagined myself to be the beachcomber; in fact I turned out to be the debris. I recall aimlessness, frustration. My apartment situation became unstable, and there were many opportunities and plans I had to turn down or compromise on because of health concerns. The sense of stagnancy only started to lift towards the end of the year.
2023 - Momentum. I chose this word hoping that things were starting to change for the better. It was meant to bring to mind a stone rolling down a hill, gently brushing against mosses and lichens, picking up speed gradually. 2023 was having none of that soft nonsense. It hit me almost immediately with a sudden move to a new apartment, a friend’s wedding and several solo business trips one after another. It was overwhelming in places, but as housing stabilized, so did my ability to work and imagine a future again.
Driftwood and Momentum share a binder, which at first was just because there was enough space. (I tried weekly planning in a separate notebook for a while, so there were less TN inserts than usual.) Looking back, though, it makes sense that ’22 and ‘23 are paired. Together, they tell a tale of recovery, a fall and a rise. That’s why I stamped the letters on the spine vertically, zigging and zagging.
2024 - Treasure. At the end of last year, I read a lot of fantasy books and comics, which got me thinking about knights, enchanters, fabulous dragon hoards. I like the adventuresome, crushed-velvet saltwater sound of this word, the way it can mean precious objects on one side of the coin, and cherished people and memories on the other. As it turns out, both meanings did manifest themselves throughout the year. I sought and found many lovely or useful possessions (including the corner shelf) through persistent thrifting, whim-chasing. But other treasures, those most dear, came to me through no effort on my part, freely given by loved ones.
As for 2025, I’m leaning towards Arrogance. A strange one, I know. It’s not typically a positive or aspirational word. But I’m not drawn to its literal definition: “an overbearing manner of superiority and haughtiness”. Instead, what I’m turning over in my mind is its associations with willfulness, obstinate pride. It’s not the arrogance of the brutish bully or the corrupt king that I’m interested in, but the arrogance of the punk, the rebel, the outcast who walks the knife’s edge between detestable and dashing. A character who holds their head high, confidence blazing, who scorns authority and politesse and dares to demand better for themselves and others. As a shy and cautious person, there’s something admirable about it. Especially at a time of my life that feels full of doubts. It wouldn’t take much to destroy the stability and mobility I’ve spent the last few years trying to build and sustain, the resources I’ve managed to gather. Other people I care deeply about stand to lose much more—much more immediately. Yes, I fear cracking open the next volume on this shelf. But I’m also motivated to live my life even harder, commit to my values even more, and fill its pages with a chapter I won’t regret. In that context, maybe I can afford to borrow a little arrogance from that dark, determined figure in my imagination. Maybe I can’t afford not to.
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Text and photos by: A.C. Esguerra
Where to find A.C. : instagram @blueludebar
Read other stories by A.C. : Here
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